I can no longer handle the David and Annie situation. Is there a governmental agency we can call to have Annie rescued from the clutches of David and his Thai tunics? Because Annie’s eyebrows say it all. No dowry buffalo are worth this hell and this man.
First, let’s tackle the living situation. What is the nature of David’s odd friendship with Chris and his (stunning) wife Nikki? Where does Chris get all of his money? Why does he own an abandoned firehouse and camouflage Hummer in Kentucky and why is he so willing to assist his nebbish friend?
Hold on, I have more questions.
Does David have a drinking problem? I’m not sure. We tread lightly with addiction here at SND and if he or anyone reading this wants to talk about sobriety and recovery, please do reach out on Facebook. You know who else was fucking wasted as that unfortunate hot tub confrontation, though? Antonio. Who is Antonio to waltz in, full of opinions and sass? He kept poking and prodding and fueling the dumpster fire that IS David and Annie. His mocking of David’s resembling the Penguin from Batman was, however, on the nose. Kudos Antonio, you unnecessarily aggressive instigator.
And then we have Nikki, who again is one of the most stunning women in the universe, taking Annie out for Andrei-forbidden girls night that apparently involves truth bombs. “Hi, welcome to girls night! Your fiancé is borrowing money from my husband and lying to you about it.”
Annie’s response of, “Oh no. But you sponsor me for ten year,” was the only acceptable comeback. It’s remarkable how certain Nikki is that HER relationship will weather a decade but Annie’s won’t. Nikki is now livid that Chris has agreed to sponsor her new and dear friend Annie so she immediately implements the relationship-crushing forced move to an abandoned building in a flyover state. If Nikki were truly determined to ensure Annie’s success in America, thus freeing her of any legal obligation to cover Annie’s government assistance, she would nurture David and Annie’s love – not kick them to the curb to fight over a spiral staircase in Trumpville.
Nikki might want to be more concerned about her husband’s requests for rental payments in the form of Thai massage his bestie’s fiance.
Speaking of that staircase, will it be the end of David? Does he own any shirts not purchased at a sidewalk stand in Bangkok? And he seems to be sporting an awful lot of gold jewelry for someone borrowing Nikki’s community property money for dowry payments.
I don’t even have the bandwidth to take on Luis’ laissez fair attitude about his fiance’s children or that Spanish virgin’s insistence on having a fucking problem with fucking everything. That 27-year-old has some massive (and very rude) balls considering he’s never known the touch of a woman. How worldly can you be, exactly, if you’ve never kissed a girl? Maybe not worldly enough to lecture the kindhearted parents of your betrothed and maybe not worldly enough to challenge the ownership of a Mexican restaurant in New Hampshire. I’m PRETTY SURE there’s not a thriving Castilian culture in your dream home of rural Virginia, guy. He just wants to move closer to his one American bud and doesn’t care that it’s completely uprooting his 18-year-old bride from a career that she (not he) actually has. Fuck that guy. #sextalk
Also, JEEZ Elizabeth’s dad is hard on Andrei and would much prefer him to be a successful 49-year-old Floridian.
I apologize for writing so sporadically about our 90DF but you know, this sadly does not dominate the top of my priority list as IT TOTALLY SHOULD. As per usual, I look forward to your brilliant (and not racist) thou