Sweet Glory be to God in all that is reality gold. Other than the Saga of Sandusky, “Before the 90 Days” is the greatest thing to come to the TLC television network since they discovered 600-lb Mormon little people with multiples. My husband had grown bored with 90 Day Fiance and it’s various spin-offs that […]
Danielle and Mohamed: What is left to say?
I just can’t with this anymore. Can you? Honestly, can you? The Jbali Jdrama has taken a medical turn for the gross and cruel. This whole thing with the smell and the pee and the doctor has me all at once curious and afraid. Paired with the country’s political climate and I’m fixing to move […]
90 Day Fiance Reunion: Why Mohamed, Why?
When Danielle told Mohamed that she just wanted to be friends, then flew to Miami to openly force him back into their relationship before threatening to have him deported because he wasn’t living up to his end of the “friends” bargain, I decided that I’d finally had enough of feeding the Jbali Jbfrenzy. These people […]
The ballad of Dani and Mo: Dr. Tom of Walmart gets involved
It’s taken 12 hours to get the sound of Danielle’s wailing out of the depths of my ear canals. I had to listen to the entire 46-song “Hamilton” soundtrack twice just to free my brain of her agonizing bawling. Last week, Dani stormed out of pizza time because Mohamed wasn’t listening to her feelings. She […]
OMG Mohamed gets political. “This is not YOUR country!”
Is this 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After or a presidential debate? Mohamed is asked some pretty philosophical questions about American immigration. But first, he must hang out with his friend from Walmart and discuss intimate details of his marriage, separation, and divorce/annulment. According to Mo, Danielle tried to LOCK HIM IN THE BEDROOM. She […]
90 Day Fiance: Danielle Finally Comes Clean
Fucking finally. Danielle Mullins Jbali Mullins revealed without any hint of self-awareness that the reason she is asking for an annulment from her marriage to Mohamed is to scare him into coming back and working on their relationship. For Danielle, true Jbali love is still a Jbossibility. As I’m sure you know, this is how […]
Mohamed + Luisa + Danielle + Gabriel = PERFECTION
But first, your friendly reminder that I am recapping the new season of 90 Day Fiance for Previously TV. Read it ALL over there and tell them how much you love me. Thnx. Okay, we need to talk about Danielle and Mohamed and Gabriel and Luisa. And you might need to go first because I […]
“Does Mohamed Work Here?” Never Heard Of Him
90 Day Friends, I’ve missed you! Eve and I are so grateful that so many of you have asked for some legit (offensive) television recaps. Since you people refuse to pay us, however, we’ve gone to someone who can. You can check out Eve’s recaps of LOADS of shows (including “60 Days In”) on Previously.TV […]
Is Married at First Sight the world’s most cringe-worthy show? Discuss.
As I sat down with a giant iced coffee at 9pm and tuned into Bravo, I wondered where I would be without Andy Cohen. That man brings me so much joy/drama, and I credit him with the ripple effect his programming has had on television. Without Bravo’s pioneering efforts in ridiculous reality shows, would we […]
10 interesting things about Mohamed’s bedroom
Former 90 Day Fiance star and husband of Danielle Mullins Jbali, Mohamed Jbali posted a photo of himself lounging in his obviously-staged-for-the-occasion bedroom, with the caption, “Relaxing in my beautiful room (smiley face, heart, smiley face.)” There are so many things going on this this photograph, I need to list them numerically: 1. Um, who […]